Blood Sugar Sex Magick
“Don’t we all want to poke pins into fabric mannequins labelled as our loved ones, or to deface their photographs or whatever? Umm, neither do I.” – Smut Clyde
Author: smut.clyde
Cyclotron Branch, Before the Fall
“sadly, no-one could find any other evidence of existence for these festively-named individuals, who may well be Knock-Knock jokes that somehow gained sentience.” – Smut Clyde
The Master of the String-of-Sausages
“I am open to the possibility that they both outsourced their Western Blot production to a single, independent Wurst-Meister specialist.” – Dr Smut Clyde, art historian of the Chinese Papermill Renaissance.
Epileptic spasms of tics and glitches in Krautrock diffractograms
Smut Clyde chases free radicals in a German-run lab in China
The Rise of the Papermills
“Is it possible that through no fault of Zintzaras & Ioannidis, their work was incorporated into a papermill template, accruing hundreds of spurious citations?” – Smut Clyde
A rule-based structure of three pigs
Smut Clyde came to check how the Elsevier journal Microprocessors & Microsystems so far handled its “problems caused by dishonest guest editors and reviewers”.
Chen bacon sausage and Chen; Chen egg Chen Chen bacon and Chen…
Smut Clyde chases the ubiquitous multifaced Chen twins.
[Citation not needed]
“Even university management eventually realised that self-citations of your work, in your own papers, shouldn’t really count (“see ‘Toenail Clipping Microphotographs, Part 1’, S, Clyde 2018″). So people progressed to citation cabals among cronies, referring to each other’s work” – Smut Clyde
Polymer Papermillers Taking the Piss
Papermill Industry enters its Logical Growth Phage. Smut Clyde explains what coordination polymer chemistry has to do with chickenshit.
The Men Who Stare at Ketotic Cows
“The References dwell on bovine indigestion, seizures, and the work of N. Arunkumar.” – Smut Clyde, jazz-punk Klezmer musician.
For Better Science 